It’s a spa for the mind, an opportunity to immerse oneself in the practices that underpin graceful living, a finishing school for adults and a place to find out all one may not have learned in kindergarten. In a series designed to augment the knowledge, expand the life skills and enhance the civility and social graces of those who wish to live the quintessential good life in the 21st century, participants were nourished with thought-provoking ideas and fine food and fortified by conversations that got to the heart of daily existence.
In this three-year, three-part, 18-event symposium series, participants engaged in stimulating discussions with specialists on the ideas of key thinkers and crucial concepts, considered essential life skills and reviewed considerate, mindful and friendly conduct important to living skillfully in the 21st century.
Twelve interview conversation-based, three-hour seminars made up Part One; three five-hour writing workshops with a holistic self-care programme (developed over 20 years and based on well-practised techniques for writing and communication) comprised Part Two; and three experience-loaded symposia on bold but graceful living constituted Part Three.
S Fuller — a writer, former international journalist, university educator, coach and curriculum and workshop designer — developed the 18-part symposium for all those who wish to live the good life with finesse and verve by combining international instances, diverse experience, extensive research and wide-ranging interviews with experts and selected guest speakers.
Part One began in October 2003. It focused on the work of thinkers who have contributed to an understanding of current issues of relevance to contemporary life, such as the centrality of thought and language to action and experience, the importance of systems to human development, the power of the mind, and the unity between mind, body and the environment. In covering these topics with specialists, speaker guests were selected ahead of the seminars, the material to be covered in the seminar discussed before the event, and an interview format used to structure the conversation on the day which was then followed with participants’ questions.
The thinkers in the series were Buddha, Bertrand Russell, Gregory Bateson, Edward De Bono, Sigmund Freud, Jacques Derrida, and Jacques Lacan, and the notions considered were the unconscious, the body, the “soul,” poststructuralism, mindfulness, the core dynamics of human existence, sourcing and the notion of intellectual property.
Part Two reviewed the essentials of good communication and writing skills and considered the importance practices of self-care to these endeavours. This focus on the essential life skill of writing and communicating included the programme RAW© alongside discussions of self-care — which included the practices of mindful breathing and meditation, of yoga, reflexology, healthy nutrition, good eating, fresh food and fresh ideas, and individual and environmental sustainability.
In Part Three the focus was on sustainable, considerate, mindful, aware, friendly and refined conduct, protocols of perfection and matters of tact and manners. The first symposium in this final section considered flower finesse, appropriate dress, sustainable and fitting fabrics, design ideas for the ideal contemporary environment and what one needs to know in the social milieu about wine and wine drinking (including the benefits of breathing). Reciprocity, noticing, civility and friendship (all Buddhist specialties) and being in the moment, the ideal guest and consummate host were at the core of these conversations, and were brought together in a programme developed for the series called ASK©. The ASK© (Aware, Sensitive, Kind) programme, developed by S Fuller, summarised and reinforced the series’ central focus, namely, the importance for graceful living of being in the moment, in the now and in the flow, negotiating the challenges of the waves of life with kindness, eloquence and elegance.
The first event in Part Three took as its starting point a multicultural contemporary scene in which manners at work and play are not clearly delineated, as they were in previous times, in part by considering the earlier example set by Venice, as well as seeing being in the moment and noticing as crucial to contemporary protocol in relatively informal democracies, such as the ones in which we now live; ones in which we are largely without a universally accepted etiquette script.
The event also addressed good taste and good tastes. Participants were given “need-to-know” packages setting out the top 13 hip, “now”, need-to-know vines, wines, and items of drinking etiquette, top 13 hip, need-to-know cheeses and pairings, the top 13 need-to-know dressing rules and top 13 need-to-know visual artists. There were also a top 13 not-to-do list and a what’s hip to-know list. The event opened with B.C. bubbly paired with French cheese from Champagne and a discussion on how to open a champagne or bubbly bottle (S took all three of the required certifying wine and liquor courses set by the wine and liquor authority governing the industry in South Africa). The four-hour event was designed around a Victorian-style but multicultural high tea, featuring Darjeeling (known as the champagne of tea), elegantly spiced chai and iced Rooibos tea, a local shortbread made with petals of flowers and salmon and cucumber sandwiches made with French country bread. Ice cider paired with cheese ended the day.
There were two conversational cameos with experts over tea — one with Lululemon clothes inventor Andrea Murray on what, if any, rules apply to what one can wear, and whether it is largely concerns over sustainability and the psychology of colour that are the “now” issue. The other conversation was with Helen Pennant who, while employed in the civil service, worked at the British embassy in Paris before coming to live in Vancouver. Helen discussed the rules of formal dining in diplomatic circles, the distinctions in this between the French and the Britons, and where these rules still apply. She also discussed her love of French cheese and the seminar’s need-to-know list of 13 “now” cheeses.
This four-hour, “good taste and good tastes” symposium included a civility demonstration with Master of Manners, gentleman and swimmer-scholar, Riley Fuller. The focus on mindful noticing, mindful eating and being in the moment threads considerate and sustainable conduct and good manners into the contemporary context.
The event also focused on the essential life skill of breathing. S is a certified meditation instructor and thus well versed in noticing how important the breath is to regulating one’s wellbeing and one’s ability to sustain oneself in an ever-changing and often emotional world. A custom-designed, graceful placemat with sheathed chopsticks was included in the price, all-inclusive, of $135.
The 17th session was on the notion of friendship, both as it relates to the important relationship between two people and in the wider sense of extending friendship and hospitality to all in the way Buddhists do. The entrance of S’s home and home office has above it the Pali words (Pali, the language of formal Buddhism, was to Asia what Latin was to Europe) “Ehi Mitta,” which means “Come, friend.”
The 18th and last session on Oct. 14, 2006 ended the three-year, 18-part series with a discussion that took the overall theme of the series, mindful noticing, full circle, expanding it to include the idea of “sideways living,”, a notion used by adventure designer Marc Fuller of Deep Snow and Surf (www.deepsnowandsurf.com) on how to be in the flow, in the present and how to negotiate the waves of life with finesse.
Fine, on-the-go food was served, including salmon gravlax and beef biltong, along with the ultimate surfing wine, Twin Fin and an energizing yogurt spring drink. Also provided were an on-the-road calendar, fast fine food booklet, place-mat with sheathed chopsticks, “Go wild” white board and matching pen and a seafood lobster bib, and the event ended with mindful noticing on the beach.
In Part One, S interviewed Ajahn Sona, Abbot of Birken Forest Monastery, one of Canada‘s most respected practitioners of Buddhist thinking. The second in the series was an interview with Dr. Rose-Marie Dechaine, a linguist at the University of British Columbia (UBC) on Russell’s ideas on language. In the third part, Dr. Mark Vessey, the chair in Christianity, Language and Culture at UBC, gave us an archeology of the notion of the “soul.” Eric Vatikiotis-Bateson, a linguistics professor at UBC, discussed the ideas of his step-father, Gregory Bateson, and Dr. Douglas Sadao Aoki, a professor of sociology at the University of Alberta, discussed the unconscious and the conscious minds.
Simon Fox — who has worked in the field of patents and intellectual property in both Australia and Canada — discussed the notion of intellectual property on Oct. 2, 2004 and Dr Nancy Frelick, who teaches in the Departments of French and Comparative Literature at UBC, discussed the work of Freud and Lacan on Oct. 1, 2005.
The thematic refreshments in Part One included gourmet gin, vintage port, hand-crafted cheeses, smoked salmon and cucumber sandwiches at the Russell seminar; Benedictine, Zabaglione with finger biscuits and European wafers with the symposium on the soul, and Japanese and Indian sweets, pakora and lemongrass drinks for the discussion with Abbot Sona. In the seminar on the conscious and the unconscious — the raw and the cooked — it was sake and sushi. For the Bateson seminar, bubbly, blini and Beluga caviar were served and for the De Bono discussion, Bailey’s and blueberries. (S Fuller had interviewed De Bono in September 1982 while a journalist, and this symposium was designed in a more De Bono-inspired, exercise-based way.
At the seminar on intellectual property on Oct. 2, 2004, the question of whether one can, in a commercial context, read the poetry of a live poet, or play or sing the song of a live artist, was asked, as was how much protection the symbol “©” gives us and other such questions, and the group sipped the newly released, French-produced “SushiWine” and tasted various types of salmon, some sushi and some sashimi. Prawns and papaya were matched with postmodernism, which was presented by S, and at the seminar on sourcing, also by S, entitled “What is Sauce for the Goose is Sauce for the Gander: Journalists Mostly Do It, Academics Often Do It, Lawyers Make A Point of Doing It, So Why Do Coaches and Public Speakers Seldom Do It?”, warm chocolate-sauced strawberries accompanied the talk.
Milo and Miso soup was served for the second discussion with Ajahn Sona on Buddhist wisdom, held in the context of the interest in psychodynamic thinking that was prevalent in June 2004.
Lavender tea and the non-protein foods that monks eat after their last meal of the day, which is at noon, was served while participants listened again to Ajahn (which means teacher) Sona on mindfulness, manners and the protocols of harmonious living on Nov. 27, 2004.
At the 12th session on Freud and Lacan with Dr. Nancy Frelick, the just released “Therapy” wine was served, accompanied by a crab dip, a smoked salmon pate, French Eiffel Tower candies, Bliss Bars and “Smarties.”
In Part Two, focused on essential skills, the 13th and 14th sessions in May and June 2006 looked at the importance of writing to communication and skillful living in the world. The five-hour writing workshops, which included a lunch and a performance package, were given by S Fuller and featured yoga, reflexology and nutrition with Vancouver practitioner Jolanta Gorwa. A Moroccan Casablanca-inspired soup with bold and earthy, but subtle flavours, was the seminar meal in May, and in June the nutritious start was RAW — Ready, Alert, Writing© — and the event included salmon sashimi, a fresh oyster, ceviche, sprouts and almonds, which both presented the benefits of RAW© and fuelled the workshop process. In the Chinese system, foods have meanings. Fish symbolises abundance, oysters a prosperous business and coconut (in the ceviche) togetherness.
In July, the discussion over lunch was led by a local Restaurant Hall of Famer, master chef, sustainability advocate and acclaimed writer, who emphasized the importance of fresh ingredients, local colour and sustainability to the crafts of both fine writing and nutritious cuisine. This 15th event began with a fresh and nutritious chilled gazpacho soup, accompanied by freshly delivered artisan bread and hand-crafted cheeses bought at the local markets, followed by a goat milk ice cream with local roasted apricots, basil and fresh currants.
The first four-hour symposium in Part Three on sustainable and considerate conduct, protocols of perfection, what is happening and now, being in the moment and what one needs to know in the social milieu about wine, reciprocity, civility and being an ideal guest and a consummate host took place in August 2006.
The three-hour symposium on friendship in all its senses followed in September and included a conversation between fast friends S Fuller and Angela Grossmann, an internationally recognised visual artist featured in that month’s edition of Harper’s Magazine, some apt quotes and a discussion of Aristotle’s conception of friendship and Buddhist protocols of friendship and reciprocity. The last event, with adventure designer Marc Fuller, took place in October, 2006.
Six of the seminars were held at the Swan Room, Lord Stanley Hotel, 1889 Alberni Street, Vancouver and 12 were held at 2964 Point Grey Road, Vancouver.
The symposium series attracted a wide range of professionals. This included authors, physicians, coaches, fine art dealers, lawyers, airline pilots, bankers, fund-raisers and designers, as well as professionals working in international relations, the civil service, the non-profit sector, public relations and financial planning, as well as counsellors, health and wellness professionals, psychiatrists, technical consultants, academics, educators, trainers, facilitators, web designers, recreation specialists and media and advertising professionals. Participants ranged in age from 25 to 88, came from Seattle, Whistler, Victoria and the wider Lower Mainland.
The all-inclusive fee for Part One with 12 three-hour seminars was $615, but sessions could be done on an individual basis as well at $55, $50, $45, $40 or $30, depending on the seminar and the number purchased at the same time.
In Part Two, the thematic writing workshops included lunch, a writing T-shirt and/or placemat and sheathed chopsticks, a binder, and yoga, reflexology and nutrition coaching, all with an ice cider closing. The five-hour workshops in Part Two ranged from $135 to $149 to $129.
Part Three ranged in price from $135 for the four-hour seminar, and from $69 to $49 for the last two symposia in the series.
This series is in the process of being written up as a book.
©S Fuller 2010